Dirty dawgs.. I mean bones
When pootling along Kensington Church Street, an area heightened with quirk and unique personality, the loud cinema style lighting bordering the House of Dirty Bones namesake, mightn’t be too obvious.
The entrance is a simple hot dog stand by day, with shelves lined in soft drinks, and an old school pin board describing the gourmet fast food offer. By night the deserted entrance is flickering with neon lighting, similar to that of a 1950s diner, the last bit of bright lighting you’ll see before tumbling down the rabbit hole as it were, and rubbing your eyes as they learn to focus in the rather dark cocktail bar and restaurant. (I was later informed that intentional low lighting was key to award winning Lee Broom’s eclectic retro ‘dive bar’ design.)
Apparent immediately, attention to detail with the design flowed through all elements of the business, from the art deco tiling on the ceiling and walls, to distinct furniture such as the host desk pinball machine and cosy yet sexy booth seating. Comfortable for chatting and slurping on cocktails before being led through to your (30 seat) private dining room or (85 seat) restaurant reservation.
I didn’t have to wait long before a drink menu was in my hand, and Ross Clarke, ex creative development chef in the Fat Duck Experimental Kitchen, had asked me what was my tipple of choice for a cocktail base. I was quick to respond whisky, with a sparkle in my eye, knowing this often startles the askee. A twenty-something blonde that enjoys whisky, really? Really. What startled me, was the enthusiasm from Ross about this project, the detail in menu preparation and service and the genius techniques used behind the scenes. Exciting.
My drink came, a Mutt’s Nuts; Woodford Reserve, cinnamon and vanilla infused maple syrup, Angostura Bitters mixed with lemon and apple juices. Rediculously delicious, so much so it had made the dinner pairings later that night, and it wasn’t disappointing to have the same drink twice.
Following lengthy chats with Ross, the consultant chef behind this clever take on the hot dog trend, we were led through to the restaurant and seated in front of an old school DJ booth, where a jazzy soul duo were setting up, vocals and keyboard – the perfect dining accompaniment. With live music every Wednesday and Friday, this being a Wednesday, we shimmied as we dined to stunning throwback tunes like Shola Ama’s ‘you might need somebody’ and Shaka Khan’s ‘ain’t nobody’. I really was in my element.
First dish out was an Asian Dog (paired with the Mutt’s Nuts), showcasing the experimental techniques these chefs are famed for (all ex Heston establishments). The sausage was covered in Kimchi puree, wasabi mayonnaise (LOVE), crispy seaweed and sesame seeds.
This was followed by crispy spiced fried chicken with charred lemon. Moist but not greasy chicken served with an array of sauces. My favourite 
being Dirty Bones own barbecue sauce; a clever combination of cider, coca-cola, ginger ale, star anise, marshmallow injections, bourbon, Japanese vinegar, caramel and Dr Pepper. 
You can tell these guys like to play around behind the scenes, but I’m glad they did. I needed one to take home. This dish was paired with Leo the Wonderdog; El Jimador Tequila, Chateau du Breuil Calvados, and lemon and vihno verde. I adored vinho verde when I took a short trip to Porto recently, and stocked my suitcase on return, keeping the Portuguese dream alive. This cocktail was fresh, zesty and oh so high in alcohol content, yet it tasted smooth and scarily drinkable.
The last sample main was served in a sweet homemade brioche; the signature Burger Dog. An aged bavette and beef fat mince, with beer cheese that had been fermented overnight and mixed with marmite and Worcester sauce. This came smothered in Frenchies mustard and tomato ketchup and served with a Steak to the Heart cocktail; Martell cognac, blackberries, raspberries, apple juice and St Cosme Little James Basket Press. The cocktails really were something special, and reminded me of Soul Shakers, the team behind the carefully personalised cocktails at the Meat Liquor brand. The specials matched to new revolving dishes, so you can’t get too attached to a favourite.
I don’t say this often, in fact ever, but if all that hadn’t sold it; the sides were the one for me. THE SIDE DISHES. Usually restaurants lack a thought here and simply offer the obvious, but Dirty Bones took side dishes to a whole new realm.
I start with my ultimate happy face, not for sensitive stomachs, but a delight to see on any British menu; charred Padron peppers. (I was overly pleased with my photo of these too).
Then the mac and cheese. My hangover favourite (cure) came as heart-warmingly as a crumble would have, forking through a breadcrumb surface into delicious gooey taleggio pasta.
I’d be a criminal not to mention the grilled (and smoked in bourbon barrels) pickles, a fantastic palate cleanser, with their own theatre of smoke as you pop open your canister.
But the cream on the top of the milk has to be the Bourbon beans. I couldn’t stop talking about them. You need to try them for yourself.
We concluded the evening, with a nursery classic; milk and cookies. Only the milk was in fact a flavoured ice cream and the cookie was a chewie brownie style recipe. Washed down with a Top Dog cocktail; Finlandia vodka, fresh strawberry, Chambord and lemon and jaio prosecco. So refreshing.
I left feeling positively swollen, and mulled on the detail behind the drinks and the dishes all the way home, with eyelids heavier with every tube stop south.
I will definitely be returning, a perfect date or casual group dining spot.
(Images are a mix of my own and the Gaztronome)
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